Being an encouraging presence and supporter to children is one of the most rewarding roles we play in life!
Encouragement plays an important role in raising children. It gives our children wings as well as helping us as parents to model the many character strengths of trust, patience, persistence, optimism and so many more…
Parenting with encouragement is about:
- nurturing self belief
- preserving positive self image
- helping children to see that all things are possible
- trusting in our children and supporting deeply so they can TRUST THEMSELVES
I remember when my son was 3 Years old we went to the park and he watched an older child effortlessly cross the bars. I saw a spark in his eyes and he reached up to the bars to have a go. The journey began. I would hold him above me on the monkey bars and the first time he would just grab a grip and hold. The second time he felt more confident as he would grab each rung as I held him firm and secure underneath and helped him to experience what it was like to go all the way across.
Over time I would slowly let go of his weight so he could begin to trust himself, know his reality of where he was at and use his own weight to build strength. We would practice this time after time, week after week. Each week, we would walk over to the park and he would be so excited as he loved to practice. Sometimes he would be frustrated and annoyed, other times he would feel powerful and optimistic.
I used words like:
“It’s okay to be frustrated, I know how much you want to do it all by yourself.”
“You seemed stronger today, how did you feel?”
He was motivated by the feeling of getting closer and closer. Then one day – which felt like years later ~ BINGO! It was the day. He went all the way by himself. It was a joyous moment for him. He did it again and again and again.
The look in his eyes said victory. His victory! A sense of capability and accomplishment.
When I recall this time 7 years ago, I realize there are many times we quietly and sincerely encourage our children in conquering fears, mastering a skill, eating dinner, going for a bath, arriving somewhere for the first time, taking off trainer wheels and loads more occasions big and small. Sometimes we think our words fall on deaf ears, or our ability to stay persistent ourselves can be a challenge. Not only are we encouraging our children, we are also encouraging ourselves.
May you recognize already the ways in which you encourage and nurture your child to greatness.
Kerry Spina is a mum of a beautiful 11(and a bit) boy Isaac as well as a Parent Coach and Yoga teacher for adults and children. She lives in Sunny Townsville Queenland Australia and loves to share her passion of gentle parenting approaches and values education. Kerry is also the creator of Kidsin Harmony ~ A music and values program for newborns to 9yrs and is the author of Harmony Cards for Kids.
Encouraging Things to Say To Your Kids – A list by Kelly Bartlett
Helping Children Learn To Overcome Frustration & Failures – By Ariadne Brill
Latest posts by Kerry Spina (see all)
- Nurturing Love: 5 Beautiful Ways to Grow the Bonds of Love with your Child - June 28, 2016
- What you Don’t Want to Say to Stop Unwanted Behaviors - November 30, 2015
- 4 Mindfulness Practices to Move from Surviving to Thriving in Parenting - January 22, 2015