The true aim of parental discipline should be to teach, guide and not inflict shame, pain, anguish or fear. Positive Parenting means to work towards mutual understanding, provide acceptable choices and building a life-long relationship based on trust and love. ♥
I am often asked about the best way to discipline a child or for tricks on how to GET a child to do something. The thing is, as parents, our goal shouldn’t be to GET our children to do things. I think as parents we do far more for our children if we choose to be there as a a guide, a compassionate kind presence that can motivate from a place of genuine interest, from the heart, with patience and understanding.
Research has shown us over and over again that parenting that focuses on being strict and authoritarian, yelling and punishing and having the final say so, is not actually effective towards raising resilient, confident, empathetic citizens.
So why do parents continue to focus so much on that part of parenting and implement systems of punishments, groundings, nagging, yelling and bribing?
I really believe that for the most part it’s because habits are hard to break and shifting towards positive practices is not always intuitive or easy. Yelling, screaming and embarrassing children along with imposing punishments has been the norm for years. Many parents don’t know any alternatives because they didn’t have any positive experiences when they made mistakes, or “bad” choices growing up.
The thing is, parenting doesn’t, and shouldn’t need to be centered on discipline that is centered on choosing punishment or using threats, withholding attention or love when things go wrong or get off track. Parenting is so much more than that.
The parent – child relationship is SO much more than that!
Over the net 10 weeks I will be sharing 10 Building Blocks or ideas that I find to be an integral part of Positive Parenting that go beyond traditional discipline. Ideas that that provide the foundation for parents and children to build long lasting relationships built on trust, understanding and connection while fostering an environment of respect for parents and children alike.
These building blocks are the things that children really need from their parents to grow up resilient, confident, capable, empathetic and caring individuals.
Each week I will be sharing ONE building block along with questions for personal growth and, I will not just throw these ideas out there, I’ll share some tools and ideas for implementing them into your parenting and family life right away too.
What you should know: The ideas may challenge what you believe, or re-affirm the path you are on – there is no RIGHT or WRONG being set in stone here, no promises of quick fixes or fail-proof methods….what I’m sharing are the building blocks – ideas – to help you put the focus of your parenting where you feel it needs to be.
So, do you want to change the focus of your parenting from fixing, nagging, struggling, yelling and demanding to finding cooperation and enjoyment? Then, I hope you will join me!
If you haven’t already, please join our Positive Parenting Community facebook page and subscribe to the blog so you don’t miss each post!
Peace & Be Well,
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Latest posts by Ariadne Brill (see all)
- Rethinking Punishment: 3 Steps that Help Children Change Unacceptable Behaviors - March 4, 2014
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- The Words to Say When Children are Disappointed - January 21, 2014