Stop Yelling with These Two Parenting Tools

Stop Yelling with These Two Parenting Tools

  Driving back from the second day of school, my two boys started to tease each other and bicker.  Determined not to yell at them and having just spotted  the recycling center parking lot,  I pulled into that lot, took out my book and started reading.  Within seconds and without prompting, they had stopped, apologized … Continue reading »

How to Stop Power Struggles

How to Stop Power Struggles

Power struggles between parents and children happen. Most often power struggles happen when the parents expectations and abilities of the child in that moment are just not in sync. So often, your job as the parent is to keep a certain amount of order so that everyone is safe and well. That also means that … Continue reading »

Positive Parenting: How to Follow Through With Limits

Positive Parenting: How to Follow Through With Limits

Most parents have great intentions when they come up with limits and boundaries. Which rules to set and why they are important are usually clear.  The power struggles and negotiation start when parents find that  keeping those limits, following through, just doesn’t go so well. While most children will not actually admit to wanting or … Continue reading »

One Important Thing To Do About Bad Behavior

One Important Thing To Do About Bad Behavior

It’s easy and yes, very tempting to hold a grudge, lecture and recall past mistakes. The problem is if we don’t extend forgiveness and by that I mean, let that bad choice be addressed and then let it go, we harbor resentment.
Resentment leads to frustration, disconnection and more bad behavior. Continue reading »

When Children Test Limits and Don’t Accept Choices

When Children Test Limits and Don’t Accept Choices

Consider this. Your child chose C because it is his job. His job to practice being in charge of himself as often as possible. Her job to test you, to let you know HER preference, to state loud and clear “I am the boss of ME!” And your child is right. He IS the boss of himself, and as the boss, he gets to ultimately decide what choice he will make. This is truly evidence of just the kind of self-directed, independent soul you (most of the time) want to grow. Someone who is in charge of themselves.

Okay, but you still need to get out the door. To continue to support your child in their quest to be independent it is important to respect their choice. How does this look and still get out the door–maybe on time? Continue reading »

Positive Parenting: How Being Deliberate and Present Encourages Cooperation

Positive Parenting: How Being Deliberate and Present Encourages Cooperation

Being deliberate and present with our children is a wonderful way to encourage cooperation.  I have been thinking and reflecting a lot about being deliberate and present with my children. Even just a few weeks ago, I wasn’t focusing on this very well…my distraction was translating into disconnection. Lack of connection with my children lead directly … Continue reading »

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